A couple guys were sitting on an airplane. One seemed very nervous; biting his nails, sweating. The other guy says “hey pal, what’s the matter?”
“Oh man, I just found out my company’s transferring me to Memphis. I’m scared to death”.
“I keep hearing how dangerous it is. Crime, shootings, carjackings, gangs. I hear it’s not safe to go anywhere”.
The second guy says “Oh, it’s not as bad as the media says it is. I’ve lived in Memphis all my life. Here’s what you do. Find a nice home, enroll your kids in a good private school and mind your own business. You’ll be just fine.”
The nervous guy says “well, I guess I can take your word for it. What do you do there in Memphis?”
“Me? I’m a tailgunner on a bread truck”.